A weird question!

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Tue Aug 26, 2003 2:25 am

Do any of you ever get the feeling that you really want to be pure, but are affraid that you'll wake up one day and find out that the gods have punished you for believing in something so stupid and being naiv, and this question haunts you constantly???????

verbal gymnastics · Post by **verbal gymnastics** » Tue Aug 26, 2003 4:16 am

Is this a Santa Claus question?

bambooneedle · Post by **bambooneedle** » Tue Aug 26, 2003 5:16 am

Copenhagen Fan wrote:no I'm not high! I'm giving up the stuff....!

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Tue Aug 26, 2003 7:45 am

Bamboo..very witty indeed..

...but it still was a serious question!

and Verbal..you are correct,,it is a type of Santa Claus gig...the Santa claus of emotional purity as opposed to deciept.

firebetty · Post by **firebetty** » Tue Aug 26, 2003 1:53 pm

copie,
have you been reading my journal again?

there are strong and disconserting times that i wonder if all that i have done in attempts to live true to my heart is wrong.
but copie, you have always seemed so confident. where is the doubt coming from?

girl out of time · Post by **girl out of time** » Tue Aug 26, 2003 4:44 pm

that´s called...........idealism vs cinicism (sorry if i mispelled)

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Wed Aug 27, 2003 1:49 am

Fire Betty....I am still confident and optimistic as usual! But I have a dark side, a little devil on my shoulder that tells me...."don't be weak, don't be a wussy".....maybe because I have never been so in love before. I've always had an ace up my sleeve in all previous relationships....not this time, and yeah, it is scary to need a person, as I've always thought, "i can live without her/them" for my whole life.

firebetty · Post by **firebetty** » Wed Aug 27, 2003 1:15 pm

it sounds like the biggest risk you have faced.
is it wussier to be with her or without her?

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 3:32 am

FIRE BETTY....there's no way I'm not in for the long haul! are you crazy...this thread is about the feeling of impending doom when things are going well. I'm fine with being a self proclaimed wussie!!! No problemo there at all! If you saw my girlfriend you'd understand why!

You'd be suprised at the "wussie like" things I will endure for my one true love! *no details here, way too kinky for the masses*

verbal gymnastics · Post by **verbal gymnastics** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 4:02 am

Copenhagen Fan wrote: *no details here, way too kinky for the masses*

...

...but you're trying to purify yourself?

Just take 10 Hail Mary's and 10 How's Your Father's!

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 7:00 am

Dear Verbal....ja...I'm trying to purity myself...purge the inner demonic spirits that have driven me the past few years.....*although my girlfriend seems to enjoy them*

firebetty · Post by **firebetty** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 11:27 am

oh, this is the old unbearable lightness of being conundrum, with a side questioning faith.
i am no help in this department.

last time i had a "lucky streak" all i could think of is this can't be real, it will end in disaster, i don't deserve this...
people just told me to savor it and don't forget it, there are always going to be dark/rough spells.
i say doom begets doom. (really in the end i have noticed there is no control. good and bad times flow.)

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 12:16 pm

Betty..it sounds like you know what i'm talking about!

sulkygirl · Post by **sulkygirl** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 12:47 pm

I know the feeling well, Cope...sometimes, everything just seems too good to be true, & you find yourself just waiting & anticipating that big SLAP in the face that you just KNOW is coming...

As to the "wussiness" thing, trust yourself. I lost the love of my life, because he loved me so much, and was so afraid of seeming like a "wussy" to his friends & family, that he would occasionally slap me around just to prove that he WASN'T. He didn't need me to give him a reason, or to do anything to hurt or upset him. I got the hell out FAST.

miss buenos aires · Post by **miss buenos aires** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 12:54 pm

Sulkygirl, you didn't lose him, he lost you, by acting like an asshole. And anyway, 'tis better to lose a lover than to love a loser.

miss buenos aires · Post by **miss buenos aires** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 12:56 pm

You being the lover of the loser, not the loser. He's the loser. The loser that you loved, the lover that you "lost."

Okay, I'll stop now.

sulkygirl · Post by **sulkygirl** » Thu Aug 28, 2003 12:59 pm

Hmmm...

Copenhagen Fan · Post by **Copenhagen Fan** » Fri Aug 29, 2003 3:54 am

ooooh jesus Sulky...

Don't get me wrong, I'm quite a sensitive little guy, I don't have any probs. with showing my affection or feelings, or laying it on the line for a woman who floats my boat. On the contrary, I'm out of control with that stuff, I can't stop it even if I wanted to, it just pours out of me. I'm the type of guy who's been waiting for a one true love my entire life and cherish it. I just don't want to wake up one day and find that it's going to be taken away from me......especially since I'm playing this one 100% clean. I've been pushed away in the past for being too intense, having too much energy, too happy and too into my women, they have said they can't live up to the LOVE.

So it's a factor of fear for me. And I'm no violent type of guy with regards to women! I'm quite old fashioned in my values and believe in chivalry and giving. One tends to feel vulnerable in that way. I also have a notion that because of my intesity, that I'm better suited as a lover not a boyfriend. There are few women who can live up to my sex drive....I'm a very physical person. It will all work out in the end, I know that. But having something so important and so beautiful is scary at times....one begins to doubt one's self...........

bambooneedle · Post by **bambooneedle** » Mon Sep 01, 2003 10:04 pm

Have you considered colonic irrigation treatment? I hear it works wonders for peace of mind.

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A weird question!

A weird question!

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